The Wonders of a Low Carbohydrate Diet

Low carbohydrate diets became all the rage a few years back and oddly they still remain quite popular even after all the publicized controversy. So are low carbohydrate diets really so bad, or is the case against them nothing but hot air?

How Low Carb Diets Work

Our body uses carbohydrates as its main source of fuel. This fuel is used for many functions and is what gives us the energy to perform from day to day. When the body is starved of carbohydrates, it starts to use fat reserves in place of carbohydrates and this is how low carb diets supposedly result in weight loss.

So What Is So Bad With That?

Well when the body starts burning fat instead of carbohydrates it creates a chemical reaction that occurs within the kidneys. This results in a process known as ketosis and can be potentially harmful to the renal function. Low carb diets can also produce other side-effects, and while these are not hazardous to your health, they may make you somewhat unpopular.

Why Low Carb Equals Low Popularity

To be blunt, low carb diets make you stink! Ketosis can result halitosis, or bad breath. You may be thinner but the only time your friends will want to hear about your miracle diet is down the phone. You could knock down a deer from a mile away.

You can also expect a whole lot of gas and not the good kind that fuels your car. The only thing this gas will power is the power to drive away anyone stood within 10 feet of you. Wind energy may be eco-friendly and clean but your wind energy will be neither. Your stomach will feel more bloated than Santa’s Christmas sack and it is not going to contain the kind of present any child would want.

Weight Loss vs. Friend Loss

A low carbohydrate diet may help to reduce weight but part of the enjoyment of losing those extra pounds is being able to impress your friends and family with your new streamlined figure. Sadly, the chances are with your toxic breath, indigestion and atomic flatulence you will not be getting any party invites anytime soon.

Telemarketing Calls Are a Health Risk

It’s a familiar scenario: The phone rings and Caller ID displays ‘number withheld’ or ‘unknown’. You agonize whether to screen the call or ignore it completely. But maybe it is something important…like a hospital trying to reach you or maybe your workplace? Or it could be an urgent call from the bank? You rush over, desperate to grab the phone before the caller hangs up. Snatching at the handset you place it to your ear, answer with a curious, “Hello?”, and listen attentively for the response.

“Hi. This is Cindy from The Shaky Window Company. Can I take a minute of your time to ask you a few important questions?”

Telesales calls are one of the major causes of household phone damage. They can result in raised blood pressure and heightened irritation. Many victims have suffered an uncontrollable urge to curse and kick a family pet following one of these infectious calls. They should come with a warning before anyone is actually allowed to speak.

“Mental health warning: The following call may cause sudden psychosis, and result in acts of uncontrollable rage. If you are prone to losing your temper when receiving any unwanted, privacy invading call, please hang up now.”

The problem is you never know it’s a marketing call until you answer. It seems unjust that you should need to screen calls just to avoid infuriating phone harassment from these cold-calling pests. They do not even possess the bravery to come to your house, knock on the door, and face you in person. Plus they never offer up a full name.

Telemarketing is intrusive cowardice of the highest order and nobody on earth who possesses a phone ever wants these calls. So why are they allowed? Phone service providers should be held accountable. Let everyone stand up to the phone companies and declare: ‘We will only pay when you stop providing telemarketing irritants with phone lines’.